Movie Review: ANG PANDAY 2 - Film Forgery?

First of all, let me just say that I'm a fan of Ang Panday. I really like the character and have always thought of it as one of the most original concepts to come out of Philippine comics. However, what with the controversies surrounding its creator, self-proclaimed komiks king and UNPROCLAIMED "National Artist" Carlo J. Caparas, my fondness for the franchise comes with a certain amount of guilt. And after seeing the new film Ang Panday 2, I've found myself feeling even more guilty for patronizing it. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Ang Panday 2 ("The Blacksmith 2") is the sequel to the 2009 Panday remake starring Ramon "Bong" Revilla, Jr. While this is the second film in the rebooted series, this is technically Revilla's third Panday movie, having initially played the part (or rather, the descendant of the original) in 1993's Dugo ng Panday ("Blood of the Blacksmith"). Not only is this film a sequel to the remake, it is practically a remake of the original Panday sequel as well. It borrows certain story elements from 1981's Pagbabalik ng Panday ("Return of the Blacksmith"), but with a few modifications. In both films, the arch-villain Lizardo is resurrected by a witch. In the 1981 version, our hero Flavio was aided by a tribe of bird people; in Panday 2, he meets a race of dragon people. He even battles a mer-creature in both movies; a siyokoy in the 1981 film and a sireno in the new one (personally, I prefer the siyokoy in the original. It just looked much more threatening than a "mermaid man," you know?). Interestingly, Panday 2 also samples a bit from the 1993 parody film Pandoy, Ang Alalay ng Panday ("Pandoy, The Blacksmith's Apprentice"). During the obligatory desert battle scene, Flavio makes the blade of his sword grow to an extremely enormous length, much like Pandoy did in the spoof. Just as the original Flavio, the late Fernando Poe, Jr., was the King of Philippine Movies, Bong Revilla may as well be crowned the King of Philippine Fantasy Movies. Revilla has often professed that the Panday character has always been his dream role, and considering that his past fantasy films usually had some Panday-like elements in them (particularly in Ang Agimat: Anting Anting ni Lolo and Exodus: Tales from the Enchanted Kingdom), it would seem that his career has been in preparation for playing the sword-swinging champion. Unlike FPJ, whose eternally heroic screen image mandated that his Panday could only be portrayed as the pure and perfect hero, Revilla's interpretation(s) of the character is allowed to be a bit more flawed. In his first actual Panday film (Dugo ng Panday), he played the brash and arrogant delinquent descendant of the original Blacksmith. In the 2009 remake, his Flavio was shown to have bouts of self-doubt. As for the sequel, at some point there's an indication that the hero worship is getting into Flavio's head and he's relying a little too much on the sword. It's an interesting angle to develop, but unfortunately, it's never really fully explored. This potentially intriguing bit of character development lasts for all of one scene, and after getting chastised by his blind mentor, Flavio instantly reverts back to full-functioning do-gooder mode for the rest of the film. Another difference between the old and new series is their approach to romance. In the original series, there would be a new leading lady in each film, and except perhaps for the first one, there is hardly any romantic subplot. Girls may fall for Flavio, but he rarely ever reciprocates their feelings. In the current Panday films, however, there is an ongoing love affair between Flavio and the mythical Filipino fairy Maria Makiling (played by Iza Calzado). In one scene, Maria is seen trying on her wedding gown when a couple of women show up to tell her that it's bad luck to do so. You know, if there's one thing I really hate in a lot of Pinoy films and TV shows, it's how they insist on perpetuating old superstitions. For instance, like if a glass or any breakable object falls to the floor and shatters, it means something bad has happened to the person who owns said object (usually, a car accident); stupid stuff like that. In this film, the superstition of the day is that a bride-to-be should never put on her wedding gown on the night before her wedding. Because if she does, flying demons will come and take her away. The other female lead in the film is Marian Rivera as the human alter-ego of Flavio's pet dragon. In the scene where she reveals herself, a villain asks who she is, and she answers "AKO ANG IYONG BANUNGOT!" ("I AM YOUR NIGHTMARE!") It's funny, we always hear that old "I'm your worst nightmare!" line used in a lot of movies (I don't even remember where it's originally from), but this is the first time I've heard it in Tagalog. And Marian's delivery of the line just sounded so bad-ass. Fun Fact! Actor Phillip Salvador, who plays Lizardo in the movie, also appeared as Flavio in the first episode of the 2005-06 Panday television series, making him the only actor to date to have played both the original Panday and his arch-nemesis! Anyway, Lizardo, as portrayed by the late Max Alvarado in the original films, has always struck me as a "happy evildoer," and that's basically how Salvador plays him, but dialed up to lunatic levels and with extra sleaze. Some may find the portrayal somewhat Joker-ish, considering the pasty-faced make-up and the maniacal cackling. Just the same, I like that the character is played here as a total depraved freak. Compared to the previous versions, Lizardo actually comes off as literally lizard-like in the reboot. In the film's climactic battle, Lizardo fights Flavio by transforming himself into a giant monster... just like he did in the previous movie (although he was a giant snake that time around, but still...). It's basically the ending of every Power Rangers episode. And like in those shows, predictably, the bigger they are, the easier they are to chop down. And speaking of giant monsters, we come to the part of this review where we address the elephant in the room. Or, to be exact, the kraken in the picture... While the local press has largely ignored the issue, less-biased reviewers have noted the Panday 2 monster's resemblance to the Kraken from the 2010 Clash of the Titans remake. But just how closely do the two creatures resemble each other? Well, to be fair, Clash did only partially show the Kraken as it popped out of the water, whereas the P2 monster was shown in its full glory. So for all I know, the design of the creature's body may well have been somewhat original. But the fact remains, as evidenced by the images above, that at least the creature's head is a dead ringer for that of the Kraken's. Assuming that the rest of the creature really is an original creation, why didn't they bother to come up with a new design for its head? I mean, come on, how hard could it be? There's so much room on that big ugly lump for improvement. They could've put, oh I don't know, a large rhino horn on it maybe? Then they could've had spikes jutting out all over the place, maybe spiny fin-like ears, sort of resembling huge dragon wings. Or they could have given it six eyes, and they could have also changed the tentacles a bit so they look more like serpents. Make it look like a giant mutant triceratops/crustacean hybrid creature with a 7-headed hydra growing out of its humped back. See? Was that so damn hard? But no. The filmmakers opted for the lazy way out and got themselves a second-rate, trying hard copy-kraken. And while this may well have been a decision by the producers and the director (Mac C. Alejandre, the genius behind the horrible 2004 Lastikman movie), I don't lay the blame solely on them, but also on the effects artists themselves for going along with this con. Talented as you guys are, couldn't you have at least tried to tweak things while nobody was looking? Sure, there's a good chance that you might have gotten your @$$es fired for it. But on the other hand, maybe you might have impressed the hell out of your bosses with your creativity, and they might have realized that it's actually much better to be original. Wouldn't it be worth the gamble to express your original ideas and show the world what Filipino artistry is really capable of? No? You're just in it for a quick buck? Oh, okay. Oh, and look, they have a giant scorpion, too. They couldn't have used another type of animal, like maybe a giant spider? Or a monster cockroach? Or a carnivorous worm-thing? Anything? The copying is so shamelessly obvious it's ridiculous. It's not just that they're trying to fool the audience, it's like they don't even care if anybody notices. They might as well have flashed "HEY, LOOK! WE'RE RIPPING-OFF CLASH OF THE TITANS!" on the screen. And they have all these promos for the film stating how it looks so "world-class." Uh-huh, sure. Just try releasing this internationally, let's see how the rest of the world reacts to it. Look, showbiz-land, times have changed. This isn't like the old days when a local movie can just rip-off any popular foreign film, but it's okay, because no one else outside the Philippines is going to see it anyway. That's not true anymore. Through the miracle of modern technology, you can break wind now and people on the other side of the globe will hear and smell it in ten seconds flat. Even if you never do officially release your little movie overseas, somehow, someway, everyone is going to know about it. The world is watching. Whatever virtues this picture does have will be overlooked. They'll notice the kraken, the giant scorpion, the hero on his flying steed and his extendable sword (it won't even matter that Panday had the extendable sword first), and all they'll see is a Clash of the Titans knock-off. As a Panday fan, I find it sad that this is the version of the character that the world will come to know. As a Filipino, I find it shameful that the world will look at us as nothing more than a bunch of rip-off artists. I have to admit, I did rather like the 2009 Panday film. I thought it was cool that in a Metro Manila Film Festival that is essentially a showcase for quickie movies (let's face facts here), here was a film that actually took its time, having been in production for about a year; much longer than the scant few months that a typical filmfest entry takes to get made. And while not perfect, I thought it was a pretty well-made film as far as MMFF entries go. Panday 2 was about 2 years in the making, an even longer production time than the first installment, so I had very high hopes for it. Unfortunately, the great legacy forged by the heroic Blacksmith has been tainted by an act of film forgery.

Movie Reviews: SUPER INDAY 2010/AGIMAT & ENTENG

It looks like RPG Metanoia raised the bar for my appreciation of Filipino films. There are these 2 other 2010 Metro Manila Film Festival entries that I was keen on seeing and reviewing, but since then it had been an effort just to drag myself to go watch them. Well, I have, and here are my reviews. I won't say whether you should go see them or not, I'll just tell you what I liked and didn't like about them, and perhaps you can make your own decisions from there.

SUPER INDAY AND THE GOLDEN BIBE

Premise:

A remake of the 1988 movie of the same name which starred Maricel Soriano and Aiza Seguerra in the title roles. In this version, the Golden Bibe ("Golden Duck") is now a gay fallen angel (John Lapus) who must earn his way back to Heaven by turning country girl Inday (Marian Rivera) into a superheroine. Meanwhile, Inday has her own personal drama regrding her long-lost parents and journeys to the city in search of them.

What I Liked:

Marian Rivera is a damn good actress. She can play just about any role they give her, and here we see her shifting effortlessly from serious to comedic in literally seconds. I guess it comes with being isa pong psychology.

Buboy Villar appears to be Marian's official sidekick, and there's a reason for that. They have great onscreen chemistry.

Jake Cuenca is a capable enough romantic lead and action hero. His character Amazing-J is like a combination of Bruce Wayne and Blade (except he can fly), and his suit reminds me a little of Kamen Rider.

If you've seen the original Super Inday with Maricel Soriano, she wore one of the ugliest pinoy superhero costumes ever (what was up with the hideous wig?). When Maricel's niece Meryll Soriano took over the role for the 2006-07 ABS-CBN TV series Super Inggo, they later gave her a costume that looked even worse. Finally, after years of super-fashion disasters, the costume in the 2010 version is a vast improvement. She kinda looks like a pink She-Ra.

What I Didn't Like:

The only cheese I like is the edible kind. I don't like too much of it in my movies.

John Lapus and Pokwang. I don't find them funny. At all. Everybody else seem to, though, so maybe there's something wrong with me.

The film's marketing made it a point to keep the "mystery" villain's identity a secret-- despite the fact that it's bloody obvious who it is. Just the same, I won't spoil it for the one clueless person out there who hasn't figured it out.

The bad guys in this version are an old witch, a bunch of zombies and a gang of evil mascots (actually, they're supposed to be man-sized living toys, one of which looks like a cardboard version of one of those mechanized creatures from Hellboy II). Yawn. Compare this to the original film, which had a scorpion woman, a scrawny shape-shifting lizard dude, alien monsters and a giant spider. Now granted, that movie's special effects were too flimsy to effectively realize them, but the idea at least sounds imaginative on paper. The remake does have a giant creature show up at the end, but it's too little too late.

The theme song f@$#ing grates. When it played at the end, it made me feel embarassed to be there. I literally walked out of the theater with my head hanging low in shame.

SI AGIMAT AT SI ENTENG KABISOTE

Premise:

A 2-in-1 sequel, this would be the 5th film in the Enteng Kabisote franchise (or if you like, the 7th film in the Okey Ka, Fairy Ko franchise), as well as the follow-up to the 2002 film Ang Agimat: Anting-anting ni Lolo. Mystical warrior Agimat (Ramon "Bong" Revilla, Jr. ) and mortal everyman hero Enteng (Vic Sotto) cross over into each other's worlds to battle a common evil. The alliance is an uneasy one, as Enteng gets jealous when he thinks Agimat is flirting with his fairy wife Faye (Gwen Zamora), while the solitary Agimat is envious of Enteng's family. The villains then try to take advantage of this to turn the two heroes against each other.

What I Liked:

If you've seen any of the previous Enteng Kabisote movies, you pretty much know what to expect. That may be tedium to some, but its simply friendly familiarity to its fans. The EK films are made for a particular audience that will love them no matter what, so they're almost "critic-proof." These viewers aren't there for high-art; they're just there to hang out with their old onscreen buds and be entertained.

There's a genuine sense of family among the regular EK cast that comes through in their performance. Also, Vic Sotto and his fellow comedians are just naturally funny. The jokes in the film aren't necessarily funny by themselves, but its Sotto and company's natural delivery that makes them so. They can make any line, no matter how corny, sound hilarious.

I wouldn't say that I'm a fan of Bong Revilla exactly, but he seems to be the only one out there in the local movie industry at the moment championing serious Filipino films in the fantasy-adventure genre. The production values keep improving with each of his movies, and I'm looking forward to what he comes up with next (Panday 2 is reportedly in the works).

Special effects in Filipino films are starting to get better. Sure, they may not be quite as spectacular as those in Hollywood productions, but they now look much more seamless and pleasing to the eye, and that's all I could ask for. I would say SAASEK has the best special effects of all the previous EK films.

Usually, I hate product placement, but the EK movies get away with it by making it look like a joke.

Amy Perez just may be the best Ina Magenta since Charito Solis.

Sam Pinto is hot. Gwen Zamora is cute.

What I Didn't Like:

While I did say this film is almost critic-proof, I'll whine a bit about it anyway.

There are no real surprises in the film. It just follows a set, predictable pattern. The bad guys don't have much of a master plan other than "Let's resurrect all our minions, then kill our enemies," and of course they never really make good on the latter part. Someone dies, then immediately gets brought back to life, which makes the death pointless. The conflict between the 2 leads lasts just about as long as it does in the trailer before someone breaks them up and irons-out the misunderstanding. Then the good guys fight the bad guys, they win and have a picture-taking session.

Throughout the film, we see a cool CGI (I think) exterior shot of the villains' lair; this massive, ominous, evil-looking temple set amidst a bleak, atmospheric backdrop. When the heroes raid them in the climax, it's suddenly this cheap-looking set on a hill in broad daylight.

The fights consist mainly of the combatants going at it until the good guys score a lucky shot and/or the bad guys just stop putting up a fight. The action isn't that bad, I just wish they were a little more, I don't know-- clever? When the main villains get killed, it just happens. No drama, just "Zap! You're dead!" I guess it doesn't really matter, considering one of those villains came back to life twice already. They'll probably be back in the inevitable sequel. The end fight is with a monster goon who just shows up out of nowhere. He puts up more of a fight, until he practically lets the heroes stab him to death in the end.

Speaking of sequels, I hate it when a movie announces "watch out for part 2" at the end. Lucky for them the film's a hit, but what if it tanked? Then they'd just look stupid. Sotto also pulled the same thing on Fantastic Man and Ang Darling Kong Aswang. Those sequels probably won't be coming out anytime soon.

Sam Pinto's character is creepy. She plays an amazon with a stalker-like fixation on Agimat. The romantic angle isn't really developed well; she's the love interest simply because the film says she is. Sam seems to have some potential as an actress, but her diction gets in the way.

Gwen Zamora feels like a generic leading lady. She doesn't seem to have the same presence as the previous Fayes. It doesn't help that in her intro scene, they just had her casually walk in. As for her acting, she seems to try a bit too hard, but still comes off bland.

Speaking of the many faces of Faye, in the scene where they enumerate the previous actresses who played the character, they missed one: Dawn Zulueta, who took over the role when the Okey Ka, Fairy Ko sitcom transferred to GMA 7 in the mid-1990's.

The theme song is basically the same damn one they've been using in all the EK films, but with slightly different lyrics and arrangement each time. Actually, the instrumentals aren't bad (the guitar version kinda rocks), but I don't think I can take any more of that chorus with the guy singing "EEEEEEEENTEEEENG KABISOOOOOOTEEEEEEEEHHH!!!!"

Then there are the constant TV ads where they boast that they're breaking box-office records. I don't f@$#ing care. So you're a hit, fine, I'm happy for you, I'ma let you finish, but RPG Metanoia is the best MMFF movie of all time, OF ALL TIME! (yeesh, that was so 2009.)

Ah, well, at least the ads don't have some annoying guy going "NUMBER ONE! NUMBER ONE! NUMBER ONE!" again.

It's also funny that those ads are proudly announcing that the Cinema Evaluation Board graded them a "B." You know, everywhere else in the world, being called a B-Grade movie isn't exactly a compliment...